Joelle Nelson
"There's nothing like jumping off a platform 200 feet in the air to get over your fear of heights," said senior Joelle Nelson, in an attempt to get people to read her La Puma profile.

"Seriously, I've had this same profile since freshman year," she said, "I still think no one has read it except maybe my mom."

Unfortunately for Nelson, the website analytics show a different story: not even her mother has viewed her profile page. "Maybe it's the picture," said Nelson.

In fact, according to every current and former La Puma reporter, the camera used for headshots is universally and inexplicably unflattering. By one measure, students recorded a 38% increase in the appearance of yellow teeth. Nelson added, "I should stop talking about my yellow teeth. That would probably get more people to read this."

Senior editor and friend of Nelson, Genie Lee, said, "I don't know, there's probably nothing we can do to get people to see these. I mean, Joelle could at least stop quoting me about her profile because I've never read it either."

Like former editors in chiefs, this profile will probably haunt Nelson for years after graduation. "It's the 1st thing that comes up when you Google my name," she said.

Joelle Nelson, Editor-in-Chief

Dec 13, 2018
Group Projects Unfair to Top Students (Story)
Oct 29, 2018
Rat Infestation Disrupts Campus (Story)
Oct 26, 2018
Silva’s Bee Hive Represents “Unity” (Story)
Oct 10, 2018
Video Production Simulates Trauma Injuries (Story)
Oct 03, 2018
Fascinating First-Sentence Advice (Story)
Sep 21, 2018
Math Vacancy Helps Cousins Connect (Story)
May 24, 2018
Yoga Program Expands District-Wide (Story)
May 03, 2018
Open Mic Appeals to Broader Audience (Story)
Mar 29, 2018
Shame Culture Endangers Student Wellness (Story)
Mar 20, 2018
Walsh Receives Top Teacher Nomination (Story)
Mar 20, 2018
Cyberbullying Receives Inadequate Response (Story)
Feb 27, 2018
Weak Oversight Raises Concerns over Club Legitimacy (Story)
Feb 06, 2018
Sculptures Brighten Open House Event (Story)
Jan 29, 2018
Light Sculptures Offer Collaboration (Story)
Jan 25, 2018
Block Schedule Allows Project Based Learning (Story)
Jan 10, 2018
College Veterans Share Experiences (Story)
Jan 08, 2018
Alumnus Shares College, Career Experiences (Story)
Jan 02, 2018
Paralyzed Alumnus Finishes 2nd Marathon (Story)
Dec 11, 2017
Moroz Wins 2nd Consecutive World Crown (Story)
Dec 05, 2017
Museum, Cathedral Visits Supplement Art History (Story/Media)
Nov 14, 2017
Letter From the Editor (Story)
Oct 24, 2017
Herzig Beats Cancer, Returns to Classroom (Story)
Oct 23, 2017
Car Wreck Forces Road Closure (Story)
Oct 18, 2017
Seniors Missing Vital Life Skills (Story)
Sep 29, 2017
Antifa Fueling Alt-Right Fire (Story)
Sep 29, 2017
Science Club Challenges Teachers (Story)
Sep 29, 2017
Spring Concert Sends off Seniors (Story)
May 24, 2017
Testing Taken Too Seriously (Story)
May 19, 2017
Documentary Wins Festival Award (Story)
May 03, 2017
Formal Education Undervalued by Teens (Story)
Mar 29, 2017
Weather Complicates Roadway Projects (Story)
Mar 07, 2017
Liking Something Doesn’t Necessarily Make It True (Story)
Mar 01, 2017
Rain, Season Overlap Create Unique Challenges (Story)
Feb 23, 2017
Grunge Decade Makes Comeback (Story)
Jan 31, 2017
Famed Musician Visits Ensemble (Story)
Jan 17, 2017
Cooks Examine Chemical Properties (Story)
Jan 17, 2017
Personal Profiles Not So Personal (Story)
Jan 06, 2017
Personal Experience Fuels Poetic Expression for Siu (Story)
Dec 08, 2016
Competition Increases Can Donations (Story)
Nov 10, 2016
Club Improves Campus Trash Sorting (Story)
Nov 09, 2016
Poultry Club Raises Friendlier Flock (Story)
Nov 01, 2016
Rosario Reveals Diversity through Art (Story)
Oct 21, 2016
Don’t Throw Votes Away (Story)
May 31, 2016
Burnett Drives to State Tourney (Story)
May 23, 2016
Interact Club Volunteers at Oakland Walk (Story)
May 02, 2016
Newcomers Deserve Kindness, Not Cruelty (Story)
Apr 22, 2016
Silence Recognizes LGBTQ Issues (Story)
Apr 14, 2016
Baseball Bats Beat Mats (Story)
Mar 22, 2016
Holocaust Survivor Speaks to Freshmen (Story)
Mar 02, 2016
Club Sails through Oakland Harbor (Story/Media)
Feb 25, 2016
Dress Drive Recycles Prom Gowns (Story)
Feb 17, 2016
Drama Casts Spring Production (Story/Media)
Feb 08, 2016
Middle School Visits Promote Early Involvement (Story)
Feb 02, 2016
Light Installations Planned for Open House (Story)
Jan 15, 2016
Science Revealed One Frame at a Time (Story)
Dec 24, 2015
Social Studies Simulates Africa Scramble (Story)
Dec 17, 2015
Can Drive Helps County Hungry (Story)
Dec 03, 2015
Russian Native Thrives on Ice (Story)
Nov 09, 2015
JV Tennis Completes Spirited Season (Story/Media)
Oct 27, 2015
Foss Enjoys Ball Game Birthday (Story)
Oct 27, 2015
Thursday Food Trucks Support Junior Class (Story)
Oct 19, 2015
Activity Contributes to Bird Migration Database (Story/Media)
Oct 09, 2015
Anyone Lesser Evil than Trump (Story)
Sep 21, 2015
Daily Themes Denote Spirit Week (Story)
Sep 21, 2015
Practice Meet Welcomes New Runners (Story)